melanieb_tx (melanieb_tx) wrote,

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The best feeling...

I had a good night last night…

That doesn’t even come close to how good I felt…I was on cloud nine, or at least cloud eight, smiling like I haven’t smiled in a long time.

What made me smile so???

I went to the scout meeting last night to bring Valerie a bunch of scout manuals and activity guides that I managed to get copies of. I got there, had to stand and wait a while because no one had arrived to unlock the church. We stood around talking about how nice the weather was, the kiddos running around the church buildings in a game of ‘chase’ and waited. Finally Shirley arrived and we went inside but Valerie was late so I waited even more. I felt stupid standing there, everyone getting ready for the meeting, a few of the guys standing nearby comparing cell-phones, watching the parking lot to see if she’d arrive.

I waited about fifteen minutes longer than I had planned on being there.

Finally when I had given up and walked out to my car to leave Valerie showed up.

I walked over to her Explorer and she asked me if I would help her carry in a tote filled with shells and fossils…and I agreed.

She popped the back of the vehicle open and I lifted the rising door…and the tote fell on the ground upside down with a loud tinkling sound. Yikes!

Everything was fine…shells simply sound like that. We carried it up to the church and while headed up there one of the boys asked, “Did you used to be a boy?”

Ugh…they don’t really know me that well though a couple may be old enough to recall me as a man…I simply smiled and said nothing.

We dropped off the shells and came back for the books…and Valerie said, “You really do make a very pretty woman.”

Valerie and I have never discussed my transition, nor have I talked about it with anyone else there…she’s been the first to acknowledge it in any way…and it felt wonderful.

I know…something like this is such a small thing, a few simple words…but it kept me glowing well into the wee hours and lingered into today. It wasn’t just the words…it was the sincerity in them. She was being honest.

I’ve been kind-of down recently, and between that simple statement and a comment I had recently from someone else saying I was doing great I felt very…correct…in my chosen path, something that I knew but it wasn’t making me smile much lately. I think I’m starting to come around though…and I reaffirm that a lot of big changes are in store this year.

For everyone who has wished me well, expressed their interest in my transition, or simply stopped by to tell me something kind…I truly appreciate it. You have no true idea of how much those words mean to me.

Have a good weekend!

Tags: me, transition
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